Many of you by now have heard of the huge scandal taking place in High Point concerning a youth pastor, a 14 year old and some not so great charges that continually seem to keep piling up. For a great part of this I have consciously remained silent for the mere fact of others feelings, I know some of the youth, I know many people who know this person, etc. etc.
But as time has passed and I have read and re-read comments, postings from news reporters across the nation (this story has hit CNN, MSN, etc. etc.) and since I am protected by amendment rights I am going to state my opinion now. If you don't like it, see the X button on the top right of your screen. Click it.
I am not going to stoop so low as to call this man a monster - maybe sincerely misguided, unaccounted for and sincerely stupid. But not a monster. I am well aware of the fact that people make mistakes, but here's the deal - he's 29, he married, TWO kids. She's 14, maybe in the 8/9th grade, she can't drive, JUST now probably going through puberty, and is no where near the emotional stability of handling relationships. More or less a relationship of this magnitude with an adult.
This dude, especially being a youth pastor should KNOW this. It should have crossed his mind, "HEY! I'm married and this isn't cool. Even if I wasn't married, this still isn't cool." There is a difference between a mistake and making the conscious decision to carry through something that one knows is wrong. This is something called pre-meditation. This is so many shades of wrong and it does make me sick to my stomach to think about it for so many reasons. For the girl, for the guy, for the families. It's just... the whole thing is so....... fucked.
It is sad. And I am very sure of God's grace and I'm sure it's in this and all that wonderful warm fuzzy feeling crap. Jesus had something to say about people who caused children to stumble: "If anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him if a large millstone were hung around his neck and he were drowned at the bottom of the sea. (Matthew 18:6)
The guy needs to bare his millstone. He NEEDS to take responsibility for his actions and I refuse to just dismiss it because he was a "great guy" I'm sure he was and still is; but that does not cover up for his actions. That does not give him a "get out of jail free" card. My heart breaks for the guy, the church, the guys family, the gal, the gal's family etc. It's a genuinely hard situation that quiet honestly shouldn't even be a reality, but it is.
The sad thing is I can count on 2 hands of the youth pastors that I know that have been caught up with getting too close to their teenagers - not neccessairly of this magnitude, but still. Guys, I swear on all that is holy, keep that damn thing in your pants. Keep your hands, your words and your mind off what IS NOT yours.
Again, I'm not saying these things in a spirit of hate or meanness; I am praying for all that is involved here. I know that it is much needed.